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Very mouthy and slightly neurotic retro enthusiast who wants to be everything but doesn't want to leave the comfort of her one house, and finds that being a bookworm can actually be funner than anything else...

Thursday 17 May 2018

Graceful sway with John



I had an interesting conversation with my friends yesterday about what girls do when we have to pee when we are out and about as them public toilets are no place for delicate tushes.

 So, what do we do if we can’t pee standing or sitting down?

Well the answer is, we hover!  We do the very supple dance move with the toilet, we do the “Surf Rider” and we hope we are not going to be “Wipe out”.
It might be a surprise to some of you out there, but a girl is thought from a young age not to put that tushy down on the disgusting public toilet sit. I was probably told this by my mama before I could even reach the toilet but I can definitely recall being told about the hover move from the moment I could pee independently.
    
Now to be honest it takes years of practice to achieve “the moves” and to balance out without using hands on the cubical walls. But I tell you, once you achieve that stage, you are called the master jedi, the overlord of the toilet tango, the queen of the comfort station.
However, for one to deserve the title, one has to have strong leg muscles, especially thigh muscles.      
So, if you think women do squats to achieve the look of Kim Kardashian’s behind, you are so wrong my friend!  We squat for one purpose and that is so we can go out without a fear of peeing in public toilets. So, we can be carefree, enjoying cold beverages without worrying what we’ll do, once the good ol’ pal bladder caves in. We do it for that, oh so graceful sway with John, we knew we’ll do at lest once that night 😉.

So, my lovely people this is how we do it, now you know and if there is a fellow woman out there who wasn’t aware of the toilet tango, STOP wasting that toilet paper for creating the toilet seat cover and join our levitation yellow lady club today, so you can make something good for the environment and your thigh strength.







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